How to Stop Your Divorce
If you have found this page, you may be in a situation where it looks like there is no chance to stop your divorce. You might have already signed some papers to start the process or even had a meeting with a judge. Even if all this is true you may be feeling that you really don’t want to go through with it. If that’s the case, don’t give up. No matter which one of you started the process, there still may be a way to stop your divorce.
3 Key Tips to Stop Your Divorce
If you want to stop your divorce, you need to take a good look at yourself and be willing to make corrections if needed. It doesn’t matter if your spouse is at fault, even if they admit it. You just have to take responsibility for your actions. You are the only one you can change, so don’t worry about anyone else. When your spouse sees a positive change in the way you behave toward them, they are more likely to respond in kind.
Put these 3 principles into practice to avoid divorce:
Keep the Lines of Communication Open:
I know this may be painful. It can be really hard to swallow your pride and be loving and kind when your spouse is being anything but lovable. Do it anyway. It’s important that you and your spouse continue to talk. Don’t make a big deal out of it and get on their case about it, just make sure you maintain communication. Even if it seems one-sided, just let them know you care about them by doing things like asking how their day has been.
Respect Your Spouse’s Needs and Interests:
Maybe your spouse is really into sports and just has to see the big game every Saturday, and you just can’t see why. Even though you don’t understand it, it may be a really big deal to them. This is just an example but the principle applies to almost anything you can imagine in a marriage. You may not understand or even agree with your spouse about something, but if you want to stop your divorce you have to try to see things from their point of view. If something is a big deal you can usually work out a compromise when both partners feel like they are an equal in the relationship.
Realize Change Is Inevitable:
The other side of the above principle is that you should be willing to change your priorities if necessary. Being stubborn will not help you stop your divorce. You have to look at the big picture. If something you are doing is really causing problems in your marriage, be willing to cut it back or cut it out. It might seem like you are the one making all the sacrifices, but somebody has to take the first step. You may even have to take the first few, but as your spouse sees your efforts they will eventually come around.
Legal Separation Doesn’t Have to End in Divorce
Some couples think the marriage is over forever once they have separated. This doesn’t have to be the case. Actually, legal separation can be a needed first step toward the goal to stop your divorce. The time apart can help couples realize what they stand to lose in a divorce. Often, they use the opportunity to get a fresh start, begin going on dates together and recapture what it was that attracted them to each other in the first place.
That doesn’t mean legal separation isn’t a serious step, only that it doesn’t have to be the end. Use the time apart to get some help for your unhappy marriage. Maybe a marriage therapist can help you both see things from a different angle. You can take advantage of the opportunity to express your frustrations, fears and hurts in a non-judgmental environment. Sometimes that can be a key to healing a relationship.
One resource many couples have used to restore their marriage is “The Magic of Making Up”. This popular program has helped thousands of couples patch up their relationships and it just might help stop your divorce.